A bear is chasing a squirrel in the woods.
They cross a river when, all of a sudden, the river genie appears.
Genie: “Well, alright. Two customers. I don’t know who triggered this whole thing, so lemme give you both 3 wishes. Bear, you start, since you’re bigger.”
Bear thinks for a moment. He smiles: “Ok, I want all the other bears in this forest to be females.”
Genie grants the wish, turns to squirrel. Squirrel thinks. He looks up to the genie: “I want a motorcycle.”
Bear shakes his head: “Squirrel, you don’t know how to wish.”
Genie then asked the bear for his second wish.
Bear responds: “All right, I want all the other bears in the COUNTRY to be females.” Genie grants the wish.
Genie turns to squirrel: “How about it?” Squirrel responds: “Gimme a motorcycle helmet.”
Bear shakes his head again. “What’s wrong with you?” Genie then turns once more to bear and asked for final wish. “You know what? I want all the other bears in the WORLD to be female.”
Genie grants the wish, then turns to squirrel.
Squirrel grabs his helmet, puts it on. He then walks to the motorcycle, gets on it. He starts it, runs the engine a little.
As he rides away, not looking back, he yells: “I WANT THE BEAR TO BE GAY!”
Three guys, one Irish, one English, and one Scottish are out walking along the beach together one day.
They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
“I will give you each one wish, that’s three wishes in total,” says the Genie.
The Scottish guy says, “I am a fisherman, my Dad’s a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity.”
So, with a blink of the Genie’s eye “poof” the oceans were teeming with fish.
The Englishman was amazed, so he said, “I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that no one will get in for all eternity.”
Again, with a blink of the Genie’s eye “poof” there was a huge wall around England.
The Irishman asks, “I’m very curious. Please tell me more about this wall.”
The Genie explains, “Well, it’s about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out.”
The Irishman says, “Please Fill it up with water.”
