A fat lady asked an expert some advice to reduce her fatness
A fat lady (To a health expert): “Give me some advice that can reduce my fatness.”
Health expert: “Okay. You must move your head to the right and the left at a particular time.”
Fat lady: “At which particular time?”
Health expert: “Whenever anybody asks you to eat.”
She Gave The Repairman Some Advice But He Didn’t Follow Them
Laura’s dishwasher stopped working, so she called a repairman.
Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the him, “I’ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll mail you a check.
“Oh, by the way, don’t worry about my bulldog, Bob. He won’t bother you. But whatever you do, NEVER talk to my parrot under ANY circumstances! I repeat, don’t talk to my parrot!”
When the repairman arrived at Laura’s apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest-looking bulldog he has ever seen.
But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.
The parrot, however, drove him crazy all the time with his incessant yelling, cursing, and name-calling.
Finally, the repairman couldn’t contain himself any longer and yelled, “Shut up you stupid, ugly bird!”
To which the parrot replied, “Get him, Bob!”
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
