An elderly gentleman had just picked up his shiny new Corvette convertible.
Feeling like a teenager again, he decided to test what the car could do.
As soon as he hit the highway, he pressed the gas—80 mph… then 90… the wind rushing through the few silver strands left on his head. He was loving it!
But in his rearview mirror, red and blue lights lit up. A state trooper was hot on his tail. Instead of slowing down, he panicked and hit the gas even harder—100… then 110… 120 mph!
Suddenly, reality set in. “What am I doing? I’m a grandfather, not a getaway driver!” He eased off the pedal and pulled over.
The trooper approached, shaking his head, and said, “Sir, my shift ends in half an hour, and it’s Friday. If you can give me one reason—just one—that I’ve never heard before for why you were speeding, I’ll let you off with a warning.”
The old man chuckled and said, “Well, officer… years ago, my wife ran away with a state trooper. I thought you were bringing her back.”
The trooper paused… and then burst out laughing!
“Have a great day, sir. Drive safe!”
An Old Man Wants A Job.
An old man wants a job, but the foreman won’t hire him until he passes a little maths test.
“Here is your first question.” The foreman says.
“Without using numbers, represent the number nine?”
“Without numbers?”
The old man says. “That’s easy.”
And he proceeds to draw three trees.
“What is this?” asks the boss.
“You don’t have a brain? Tree plus tree plus tree makes nine.” Says the old man.
“Fair enough.” Says the boss.
“Here is your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99?”
The man stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree, and hands it back.
The boss scratches his head and says.
“How on earth do you get that to represent 99?”
“Each of the trees is dirty now. So it’s a dirty tree plus a dirty tree plus a dirty tree. It’s 99.”
“Okay, last question. Again, the same rules, but represent the number 100?”
The old man stares into space again; Then he picks up the picture, makes a little mark at the base of each tree, and hands it back.
The boss looks at the picture of the man.
“You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred?”
The old man leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and whispers.
“A little dog came along and pooped by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, plus dirty tree and a turd, plus dirty tree and a turd, which makes 100.”
LOL!!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
