Little Billy was in church with his mom for Sunday Mass when he felt that he want to go to the toilet. “Mom, I think I’m going to throw up!”
She told him, “I want you to run outside as fast as you can. Run across the lawn and go behind the bushes. You can throw up behind the bushes and nobody will see you.”
So Little Billy hauled ass for the door. Less than a minute later, he returned to his seat next to his mom. He had a look of obvious relief on his young face.
“Did you make it all the way to the bushes, Billy?”
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“I didn’t have to go that far, mom. Just as I got to the front door, I found a box that had a sign on it: ‘FOR THE SICK.’”
One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner
You should learn to be more polite
One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself.
Tom wasn’t happy about that: “When are you going to learn to be polite?”
Bill: “If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?”
Tom: “The smaller piece, of course.”
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Bill: “What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?”