You should learn to be more polite
One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself.
Tom wasn’t happy about that: “When are you going to learn to be polite?”
Bill: “If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?”
Tom: “The smaller piece, of course.”
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Bill: “What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?”
A man walks into a barbershop and says
A man walks into a barbershop and says, “I’ll have a shave and a shoeshine.”
The barber lathers his face and sharpens the straight edge while a gorgeous woman kneels down and shines his shoes.
The man says, “Hi there. You know, would you like to spend time with me in a nice place.”
She replies, “My husband wouldn’t like that.”
The man says, “Tell him you’re working overtime, I’ll give you more money”
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She says, “You tell him. He’s the one shaving you.”